THE Chronicles of Julian Assange: Hollywood’s Next Blockbuster?
A new Hollywood blockbuster is in the offing based on the now popular Julian Assange. Instead of using the CIA or the FBI, the movie will show Barrack Obama arresting Assange by using Michelle dressed in a mini skirt as a bait. Are you ready for the Chronicles of Julian Assange?
Possible players in the Chronicles of Assange
Director – Doug Liman
Producer – James Cameron
Scriptwriter – Robert Ludlum
Leonardo di Caprio as Julian Assange
Angelina Jolie as Michelle Obama
Halle Berry as the woman who lays Assange for secret diplomatic cables
Will Smith as Barrack Obama
Hollywood directors never sleep
The directors in Hollywood never sleep. Viewers must get ready for a brand new Hollywood blockbuster titled something like The Chronicles of Julian Assange. Forget the Bourne Identity or any of the spy thrillers made before. This one will be an instant hit and we shall all flock to the theatres and make it a box office hit. Why? The guys in Hollywood must be thinking hard on how to make a kill out of Assange’s misfortunes.
Robert Ludlum or Tom Clancy may do the screen play
Hollywood directors like Doug Liman must have hired some spy thriller author like Robert Ludlum or Tom Clancy to work on a script and contacted some hot looking guy like Leonardo di Caprio or Matt Damon to play the lead role of Julian Assange the spy. They might have contacted some sexy actress like the evergreen Angelina Jolie and Halle Berry to star alongside Matt Damon.
Image via Wikipedia
Assange will be shown sleeping with powerful women to get government secrets
Can you guess how the story goes? The poor guy will not use any of the methods we know he used. The guy will not hack any computers, and neither will he bribe any diplomat to try and get those juicy government secrets. He will instead sleep with hot and sexy women including presidents, prime ministers and their deputies to get the facts. He will be made to shoot some innocent guys and torture others until they give him what he wants.
Assange might sell the government secrets to China, North Korea or Iran!
Instead of putting the secrets on some lackluster website like wikileaks, he will be made to sell them to the likes of North Korea and Iran or better still to a pipe smoking Osama bin Laden.
Obama will single handedly arrest Assange by using Michelle as a trap
President Obama will then task himself with arresting the spy. What will he do? Instead of using the CIA or even the FBI, and knowing that Julian Assange has a weakness for beautiful ladies, Obama will send the long legged Michelle to ensnare the spy in a mini skirt.
Assange will then be taken away to Guantanamo bay!
Just when Julian Assange is ready to….you know what I mean, Obama will swing into action and smash the door with one blow. He will then rain blows onto the naked spy while protecting his beloved first lady with one hand and handcuffing Assange to be taken away to Guantanamo bay. Don’t you think we shall be watching this before Easter next year?